Sunday, February 27, 2011

I Go Cause I Need It

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In Sunday School today we talked about how the world often views Christians. I often hear the word hypocrite and I must be honest and say that before I came to this place that I'm in rightthisminute, I threw that word around too. My motto was "I don't have to go to church to believe in God." And while I wasn't wrong technically, I was wrong in a big way. I have always believed in God. I have known my whole life that God was in charge. Church just didn't fit into my schedule. I knew that something was missing. And church was a lot of that. Chris joined the church that we currently go to 9 years ago. I joined 7 years ago and we've been there together ever since. I love my church. I love worshipping God there. I love serving Him there. I love the family I have there. Not biological family. But spiritual family.

We've had a lot of visitors lately. I often feel like I have to be on my best behavior around visitors. Afraid that I'll turn them off to our church or worse, God Himself. I try to be welcoming and friendly. (Sometimes I'm so distracted getting the kids settled and getting to choir and making sure Lu went to the's hard to keep my smile up and my hand outstretched.) I worry that the visitors will see me praising God one minute and fussing at my kids the next (or complaining or something else) and call me a hypocrite. I can hear them saying, "Yeah look at her, she's all holy one minute and crumbling the next." But I'm not. I'm just a sinner saved by grace. Striving to do my best. To learn from my mistakes. To worship my Lord and Savior. I don't go to church because I think I'm better than anyone else. I don't go to church to show off or to make my weekly appearance before the Lord (&/or community.) I go because I need to be refreshed. I need to get on my knees at that altar and pour out my soul to my Creator. I need to learn from those around me. I need to be with people who believe as I do. I go cause I need it.

1 comment:

  1. Great post Heidi, thanks for sharing. Because my husband is in ministry I sometimes struggle with the "going because I need it" vs. the "going because I need to." It's all about where the focus is . . . and remembering where it should be!